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【Raging Low-End Bulletin: From Dimebag Darrell's God-Tier Figure Drop to Next-Gen Brutal Death! 5 Head-Snapping News Stories from a Heavy Scene Gone Totally Chaotic】 Yo, yo, yo! To all you hardcore headbangers across the nation battling neck pain and tinnitus—are you still alive out there?! It's your rock-obsessed lunatic Johnny Thunderstone, who opened his closet this morning only to find **literally nothing but "band logos on black shirts," genuinely clutching his head in despair because he had nothing to wear to a relative's memorial service!** My amp's volume knob is permanently cranked to 11 by default, and reading today’s insane heavy music news from around the globe, I accidentally busted out some air blast beats on the morning commute train, completely terrifying the salaryman sitting next to me! …