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[Turnstile Comes to Five Guys?! The Truth Behind the "Where's the Veggie Burger?" Incident That's Making Groove Fanatics Shake Their Hips] Leaping right off the lined manuscript paper, this bassline is coming straight for your hips! Hey everyone, I'm Funky Dave Monroe—a writer possessed by the ghost of funk who loves offbeats more than three square meals a day! Heavy riffs, a punch-you-in-the-chest beat, and that supreme bouncing groove that forces anyone who hears it to start stepping on the dancefloor. That's right, the modern era's ultimate groove monsters disguised as a hardcore band, Turnstile, have just dropped some seriously juicy news! It turns out that the legendary US diner-style burger chain Five Guys has chosen them as a Featured Artist. But here's the real kicker: the parting shot they dropped in the social media comments section was so brilliantly hilarious that this writer had to stop his working background music just to burst out laughing! …